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Adulting (?)

February 26th, 2018 at 10:40 pm

Adulting is a termed used by those who are being responsible, I guess I finally made it lol.

Today I printed out a W4 at work and actually read through and made my adjustments. Rolls eyes 🙄

When I first started working, 30+ years ago I was told by an adult to always place zero on the document so that my tax refund would be nice. And so for years I did. Then I changed my withholding to two. But I sat down out of the blue and decided to read and follow the instructions for myself on the form and my actual withholdings should be three.

I'm so frustrated, not with anyone in particular but the fact that I was never taught about finances, not by parents, educators or mentors. I mean indirectly my parents always said to save and pay your bills, and I pay who I owe on time, but never taught about money.

I sit back and I reflect on the following
* taught myself how to balance a checkbook after always bouncing checks (early 20s)
* Mid 40s finally decided to review my allowances
* Paid off debt due to being frustrated but five years later back in debt, what did I learn?
On thing I was taught, and that was to do my own taxes. I've never paid anyone to do my taxes since I was 16. My economics teacher taught us how to complete a 1040EZ. I would go to the library pick up the documents and instructions for free. Now I use turbotax to complete my returns but I'm thinking of going back to good old pen and paper, it's free.
It's just amazing.

To change the subject we met up with some friends yesterday. They asked how the wedding planning was going, I said it's not going because the SO refuse to get on a budget and do right financially, and that he waste money. The SO said that I'm getting to be too cheap. They laughed but I didn't find anything funny.

So this couple goes on to tell us how they decided to put a $1000 away a month, I thought that's great, I'd love to do that. But then they go on to tell us that they purchased this new truck, Volvo, with all the bells and whistle and paid an extra $15k because they wanted the 2018 vs the 2017. Now mind you this truck starts at about $46k, I couldn't help but think I would love a new car but I don't know about spending that kind of money. They went on to tell us that they bought a condo, that's not rented in Vegas and it's only about $700 a month. I don't know a part of me was happy for them, jealous and then sad all at the same time. I couldn't help but wonder how much debt they must be in.

Well, my word for this year is gratitude. I have to remind myself that things (debt) do not make me happy. And though things may look great for others, and they may very well be, it's just not my season.

Things I'm grateful for, not in order of preference :
1. A roof over my head
2. Paid off car 🚗
3. Paid off 3 CC 💳
4. This group
5. Time spent with dad
6. Eyes finally open about my finances
7. Clothes
8. My job
9. My health
10. Family and friends
11. God's grace and patience with me
12. No more depression, thoughts of suicide- haven't had this in a while, thank you Jesus
13. No more getting upset when things don't go my way. I'm not saying I'm not disappointed but I just don't dwell on it

5 Responses to “Adulting (?) ”

  1. creditcardfree Says:

    Yay! Yes, reading the instructions on the W4 are so important to understand how your personal tax situation impacts your withholding needs. Make sure you keep an eye out for the new 2018 version when it is released and see if anything has changed or needs to be adjusted.

  2. Turtle Lover Says:

    I enjoyed reading your gratefuls :-)
    Happy to hear the no overwhelming depression. (hugs)
    thank you for always sharing.

  3. rob62521 Says:

    Amber, you have done a remarkable job and I'd day you are adulting well.

    As for the friends and their spending, as tempting as it is to compare yourself to them, please don't. People...well, I'll be blunt...lie. They say they are doing something and they mean to do something like put away a bunch of money, but in reality they may not. One gal I used to work with told me how I was such an inspiration to her and how she had all this money saved and how they are doing this and that...yet they were going to flea markets and she was spending big bucks on more stuff. The past two years their names have been in the paper for not paying their property taxes by the deadline. I don't know if they paid them off with the penalty or not, but somehow that doesn't jive with her story of how she's putting money back and has all this saved. People like to try and impress you and to be honest, talking about finances often makes people uncomfortable so they lie and say they are doing things they really aren't.

    Your gratitude list is a good week to keep yourself grounded. Bravo!

  4. snafu Says:

    Brilliant to do an honest, self assessment each year. I agree, it's too bad long term financial planning Is not on school curriculum. Most parents are nearly drowning in consumer debt according to published figures of consumer debt. Your dad did really well and his advice was correct. DR proponents are a teeny percentage of the population. When you read his book and took that course, it clicked. You realized how much 'rented money '[borrowed] went to interest, fees and penalties. You taken giant steps in a very short time frame.

    SA participants are happy to answer questions and offer suggestions, your library has tons of books on finance waiting for you and Community Colleges are a huge resource where available. You might like points made on the Forum side of SA.

  5. FrugalTexan75 Says:

    I changed my withholding on my w-4 today too. Smile

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