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I know I should not feel this way but I do

August 18th, 2007 at 08:02 am

I know what I am about to say is pure selfishness and I wish I could get rid of this feeling of joy but for some reason I can't. So I figured I will post my feelings
About 3 years ago my BF for about 6 yrs left me for some one else. I was devastated and I know we were having problems (money) but never thought he would just up and leave then the next thing I knew they were married, it was like a slap in my face.

Now I find out they are having the same if not worst problems than we had, she has caught him cheating twice, their lights were off and now they are facing foreclosure on their home.

Now I see it as he cheated on me with her and now she is faced with the same thing, he also skipped out on me owing me money now they are in the process of loosing their home and a lot more. Why am I happy, I think it is a feeling of payback, I wish I could shake this feeling because I know I am not exempt from the same thing

15 Responses to “I know I should not feel this way but I do”

  1. Nic Says:

    Maybe it's not so much "joy" you're feeling due to their unfortunate circumstances, perhaps it's seeing karma in action. What goes around comes around and it's usually armed w/a BIG kick.
    Should she have known he would cheat on her? Well,duh.
    She took up w/someone who was LESS than honorable. And he has a history of running when the going gets tough. Count your blessings. You could have been married to the loser.

  2. Ima saver Says:

    I agree, what goes around comes around!! You have the right to gloat a little!!

  3. HouseHopeful Says:

    I think its normal to feel what you're feeling. Both Nic & Ima are right!

  4. ceejay74 Says:

    It's a natural feeling, if not the most noble. You can't help what is essentially a human instinct. The fact that you feel guilty about it shows that you are much more than the sum of your gut reactions. :-) Meanwhile, enjoy the schadenfreude.

  5. pearlieq Says:

    I don't see anything wrong with enjoying this situation just a little--after all, it looks like you dodged a bullet there!

  6. katwoman Says:

    Live and learn.

  7. terri77 Says:

    I agree with pearl, you really dodged that bullet!

  8. carol Says:

    I agree with everyone else here. What you are feeling may not be exactly noble, but I can certainly understand why you might feel the way you do.

    And yes you surely did dodge a nasty bullet.

  9. veronak Says:

    Thanks guys, I knew if I posted here I would feel much better.
    You guys are completely right he was more like a jack in the box (talk about surprises)than anything else. I think I was with him for so long thinking he would change or that I could change him, wrong.
    So I will sing my song of joy Big Grin

  10. baselle Says:

    I'm with ceejay here - enjoy the schadenfreude. (German for taking pleasure in the shame of others.)

    I sense, though, that this guy really stunned you and you feel you haven't recovered fully from it even after 3 years. Remember that living well is the best revenge. Use some of this joy to help you move on.

  11. veronak Says:

    you are 100% right baselle

  12. Broken Arrow Says:

    I don't know about you, but I would've laughed my ass off (privately, not in front of their face). Yeah, I have no sense of shame or decorum.

  13. reflectionite Says:

    yeah, i agree with everyone here too, you have the right to enjoy their discomfort a little. it's shows karma does work, doesn't it?
    and also, you must remember, that silly girl he is with (or was with) must feel like a right idiot now, how could she not see that if he was to cheat with her, then he wouldn't do it TO her later on? silly girl.
    you should take a few deep breaths and think about how lucky you are, and how far you have come from dealing with him. Smile best wishes!

  14. veronak Says:

    Yes I am lucky Reflectionite, lol ...I just found out he was sued for child support from the woman before me. I guess she finally woke up and not only that, he was arrested not to long ago and maybe headed to the slammer. So I am really laughingmy a%$$ off. Boy being sued, arrested and loosing your home all in one month must be really tough..lol
    People of Faith has this saying one should never question the Almighty, He deos things for a reason. I guess I was removed from that low life for a reason, I have more money saved than I have ever had, a new car and a peace of mind and I will be completing college in a year. So I have a lot to smile about Big Grin

  15. Ima saver Says:

    You really do have a lot to smile about!

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