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January 26th, 2008 at 02:42 am

Was all I could say. My uncle came by in tears because they are going into forclosure (or already has). Apparently my aunt is responsible for paying the bills and has been keepng this little secret, that the mortgage is past due. My uncle who came home earlier than usual, got the mail. This is why when you are married, as a "couple" everyone should be involved.
I have a friend who has no idea how muh money her and her husband has because he handles everything

16 Responses to “Wow”

  1. scfr Says:

    Oh, how sad for your uncle ... You are right, in a marriage both partners need to know everything that is going on!

  2. PauletteGoddard Says:

    Yikes. I am now reminded, thanks to this very sad event, to make a list of my financial accounts and assets so my spouse can access them when something happens to me.

  3. dardhel Says:

    Good advice. I work hard to keep my wife in the loop. I sometimes have a hard time getting her interested in our finances. Atleast she understands our budget...

  4. terri77 Says:

    Yes, and you need to be able to trust your spouse to tell you the truth as well. I'm sorry that this is happening to your uncle.

  5. boomeyers Says:

    My husband does'nt want to know what is going on, but I have a spot on our desk where I keep a list of our bills and our debt. He is welcome to look whenever he wants! Smile Is this the uncle who helps you out all the time? How sad. Pray they make it through this. Maybe he can start handling this and come to some sort of agreement with the mortgage company. He can't fall apart for long, he needs to regroup and figure out what he can do! I'm sure you will be very supportive and he is lucky to have you.

  6. Amber Says:

    Yes this is the same uncle. The sad thing about it is that about two years ago the same thing happened and he borrowed money to catch up. I am not sure how he found out the last time.
    He said that since he was laid off and things has been slow (he has his own business as well) and it was mostly my aunt's money paying the bill he thought ok he would let her over see everything (since it was her money)again. He thought that this would be fair. Well in my eyes it is our money no matter who makes it, because when he was brining in the bulk she had no problem doing the same thing

  7. Ima saver Says:

    Very sad. I handle all the money, but I keep good records and my husband has some idea which banks we keep all our cash. I made up an investment book that he can look at to see all the balances. I made him go with me the other day when I moved assets and open a jumbo c.d.

  8. monkeymama Says:

    Yes I handle all the money too because my dh doesn't like to (and runs up fees, LOL). But doesn't mean I hide things from him. Usually someone takes the reins; and that is okay. But everyone should know what is going on.

    I am so sorry for your uncle. Frown

  9. Aleta Says:

    I'm also sorry to hear about your Uncle's situation. I really hope that he can do something to stop the foreclosure. It's very sad indeed.

    I handle all of the books also in the house, but my husband doesn't have alot of interest in it, but he trusts me to handle things. The spouses really do need to be involved. It's extremely important.

  10. Broken Arrow Says:

    Wow is right.

    This is just another example why I'll never go blind into finances again, regardless of what situation I find myself in.

    I hope that all works out for your aunt and uncle.

  11. SkyeBlue Says:

    This kind of thing happens alot, it's not good for anyone to be too uninvolved with their family finances. My daughter and her boyfriend just had their house foreclosed on for that exact same reason. The sad thing about it too is that he left all the bill paying up to her but the house was just in his name (her choice) so it is his credit history that is shot to you know where.

  12. Nic Says:

    This is sad. I hope he can save his credit. His marriage, I don't know. If she keeps this kind of secrets where it affects their lives, what else is she doing?

  13. Amber Says:

    Well guys just a little FYI, my uncle may have the money by tomorrow he says if so he'll pay it to catch up and put the house on the market

  14. HelpMeFriend Says:

    My husband makes all the money, but he has no idea where it all goes. He always says that he is the one paying the bills. I let him know that it is totally different from making the money. He doesn't make sure the right amount gets to all the companies that keep him in house, home, food, cable, and luxuries like water and heat.
    I feel for your uncle. If it wern't for my Grandma helping me all the time, we would have been out on the street a year ago. She tells me not to worry about paying her back until I get my tax check. Too bad everyone else wants a piece of it too.
    Tell your uncle to check out refinancing. The timing couldn't be better. He needs it now, and rates are lower. My best friend's parents are in danger of losing their home too. Where will they go? They have two grown children at home too. The 30 year old has been paying the utilities, and the 21 year old is being stupid and 21. Pray for all those who need it!

  15. jaiparis Says:

    Make sure your uncle calls your lender and see if they can work something out, it might not hurt. We were having some problems with our house as well for about 6 months and finally just got approved for a re-modification. We don't have to come up with the last 6 months of missed payments, but we did have to put something towards the loan. If they still have means to actually make the payments then then lender may be willing to re-do the loan decreasing the interest rate and bring them current. (although you didn't mention if the interest rate was also a factor)

    I would have him call as soon as possible. Hopefully he can save his house.

  16. Amber Says:

    Thanks everyone for all your well wishes and great advice. Just an fyi: my uncle caught up the mortgage but has not told his wife which I think is a bad idea but he is waiting to see what she decides

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