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Home > Am I Wrong to Ask For My Money Back?

Am I Wrong to Ask For My Money Back?

February 22nd, 2020 at 04:36 pm

‪I made a commitment to an organization to donate $500 last year, in honor of my dad for 2020.

I wanted the reward to be offered in his name. I’ve been speaking with the committee member and expressed my wishes, multiple times. Well I spoke with a member and reminded her this was what I wanted, last week. Today I get a call that it can’t be done, will I be wrong to ask for my money back? ‬

Please no judgement on why the $500 wasn’t paid towards debt. I love my dad, and really wanted to do something in honor of him.

Posted in Family/Friends | 15 Comments »

15 Responses to “Am I Wrong to Ask For My Money Back? ”

  1. LifeBalance Says:
    February 22nd, 2020 at 04:59 pm 1582390762
    1582390762

    If that was your stipulation for the gift, even if it was made verbally, I think you're completely okay to ask for the gift to be returned.

  2. creditcardfree Says:
    February 22nd, 2020 at 05:08 pm 1582391303
    1582391303

    Ask yourself some questions to help you answer this for yourself. Why did you gift this money in the first place? Is it because you believe in the organizations mission? Was the mission meaningful to you, your dad or both? Is the gift being acknowledged publicly really important? What does that gain for you? Is it enough to know that you decided to honor your father with a gift to this organization? You will know this always despite public acknowledgment, which I think is what you are asking the organization to do? Are you asking our opinion, because it feels wrong to ask for money back? And if it feels wrong why would you want to take away your original and generous gift just for the public acknowledgement?

    Gifts in my opinion are offerings of love and generosity. Our universe knows when those gifts are offered whether announced or not.

    Good luck figuring this out.

  3. Amber Says:
    February 22nd, 2020 at 05:29 pm 1582392591
    1582392591

    I believed in the organization and it’s mission, my dad who was a generous man that always gave so I wanted to continue his legacy. And yes, it’s important that they know that the gift came from a man who worked hard in the fields, love others and gave what ever he had, in hopes that the recipient would do the same, and pay it forward for someone else. Iron sharpens iron. I make donations to organizations without acknowledgments often. Like my dad, and even in my current circumstances, I give, and do not need the acknowledgement when doing so. This donation was indeed an exception, to honor publicly a man who not only did for me but others.

    However, an agreement was made, I held up my end of the bargain. The organization in my opinion was deceitful in its actions and for that reason after thinking it over, I asked for my money back.

    Thanks

  4. Wink Says:
    February 22nd, 2020 at 05:34 pm 1582392892
    1582392892

    I think this particular situation is very personal and only you can make the decision. CCF offered a really good set of questions that will help guide you. And as far as judging you for not using this money for debt? Absolutely no judgement. I think it's a lovely gesture. You have to live your life while you are on your path to becoming debt free.

  5. Creditcardfree Says:
    February 22nd, 2020 at 06:17 pm 1582395469
    1582395469

    Your original post wasn't clear to me that a clear agreement was made. I hope they now honor your request for the return of funds. Giving is personal, so only you really know the answer to your question. ✌️

  6. disneysteve Says:
    February 22nd, 2020 at 07:30 pm 1582399834
    1582399834

    If the donation was made with certain conditions attached, which is fine, and the organization isn't willing to meet those conditions, than they should return the money.

    I've been involved in similar situations when I served on our temple board. If we had donated funds that were earmarked for a certain purpose and for some reason we no longer needed the money for that purpose, we did everything we could to contact the donor and get their permission to use the money for something else. We never had to return money but we never just willy nilly decided to go against the donor's wishes.

  7. terri77 Says:
    February 22nd, 2020 at 07:45 pm 1582400718
    1582400718

    Have you actually made the donation or just made the commitment to make a donation?

  8. mumof2 Says:
    February 23rd, 2020 at 12:48 am 1582418931
    1582418931

    Yes i don't see why not...you had a request that was made if it can't be met then you have the right to ask for your money back make sure you put it in writing and ask to talk to a manager about it

  9. Amber Says:
    February 23rd, 2020 at 11:35 am 1582457734
    1582457734

    @Terri the donation has been made. I had several conversation with the committee members, one in particular, the group informed me that it was okay. She called last week to ensure that I’d mail the check. Prior to mailing, I asked her how the process would work, to confirm. She simply stated they’ll just provide in dad’s name. Well Friday, she received the check and she text me to say she wanted to talk. Then yesterday, she called to say the donation had to be a $1,000 to do so.

    I honestly feel like they knew it had to be $1,000 all along, I’m okay it, it’s their policy, but tell me. I feel as though they were deliberate in their actions and I plan on writing their board president

  10. CB in the City Says:
    February 23rd, 2020 at 02:38 pm 1582468728
    1582468728

    Most organizations have very clear guidelines on what amount a gift should be for a naming opportunity. The person you worked with should have known what the guidelines were, and should not have accepted a gift below the threshold, knowing that you wanted to honor your father. I believe you are in your rights to ask for a refund. Honestly, having worked in this field, I can't believe that a fundraiser would not know. This speaks to me of incompetence or deliberate manipulation.

  11. terri77 Says:
    February 23rd, 2020 at 04:11 pm 1582474267
    1582474267

    I think you can ask for your donation back in this circumstance. You were very clear in your intentions.

  12. disneysteve Says:
    February 23rd, 2020 at 06:14 pm 1582481675
    1582481675

    Sorry to say the organization screwed up here. Our temple has set guidelines for naming funds. They shouldn't have accepted your donation with the terms you expressed if your donation didn't meet their guidelines.

    They should return the money if that's your desire.

  13. rob62521 Says:
    February 23rd, 2020 at 08:34 pm 1582490072
    1582490072

    I say if they can't do what you wish, then yes, ask for the money back. You, in good faith, donated the money stipulating what your wishes were and they agreed to it. If they cannot do as they promised, then they shouldn't get the money.

  14. scfr Says:
    February 24th, 2020 at 02:47 am 1582512430
    1582512430

    What do you think your dad would want you to do? What would he do in your shoes?

  15. scfr Says:
    February 24th, 2020 at 02:49 am 1582512566
    1582512566

    And no, I don't think it would be wrong to ask for your money back if you feel that they were being deceitful. But I still suggest that you be guided by what your dad would do or want you to do, whether it's asking for the money back or letting them keep it.

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